E for Econs

I always told myself not to feel sad for getting not very good results

so that I could sleep well at night

I had really good sleep for the past two weeks

so I thought I could accept myself being a not very smart student

today, during econs lesson

Mr Hussain gave out worksheets to the two H3 research students

Then I was the 3^rd one who received the worksheet

He didn’t say anything like ‘You are weak so you have to do this’

But I just feel lousy

The H3 students have to do the worksheet because they did not take the common test and it is for them to practise

But I took the common test

He told Benardette and Daniel Chia who topped the class for this test not to do this worksheet as it is wasting their time

It just means that I am the extremely opposite of them

Because I got an E for econs

Of course I know E is a lousy grade

But the feeling is really bad when someone tells you that you are lousy

I am not blaming Mr Hussain for making me feel bad

He is a good teacher

I could understand almost everything he said for the past few tutorials

I just want to say that I didn’t feel good

And I know I am not good

so I will do the worksheet